


Yellow Card

by Meicdon13



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Humor, M/M, POV Outsider
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-05
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-28 17:37:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13276518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meicdon13/pseuds/Meicdon13
Summary: His uncle’s dating his ex-girlfriend’s older brother. How is Goku supposed tonotworry?





	Yellow Card

**Author's Note:**

> I was bunnied for something else set in the [_5-4-1_ universe](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2197386) and here we are. You don’t have to read the earlier fic to understand this (hopefully). Unbeta’ed. Betaed. Beta-ed?
> 
> Please enable the fic's work skin or else it might look wonky.
> 
> hmu: [twitter](https://twitter.com/MtBlackBear) • [dreamwidth](https://meicdon13.dreamwidth.org/)

Is your uncle dating my brother??

?? ?? ?wtf?????

Is your uncle dating my brother? Inquiring minds would like to know

Damn I hope not

Excuse you but my brother is a fucking CATCH

YEAH BUT can you imagine how weird it’d be if they were??

Dude I think they already ARE

*****

Lirin grabbed Goku’s arm. “ _Look!_ ” she hissed. “They’re doing it again!”

“Doing what? Talking?” Goku didn’t care if Lirin had been right about him and Nataku. There was just no way that Sanzo and Kougaiji were a thing. She’d let one matchmaking success get to her head and now she was seeing unresolved sexual tension everywhere.

“Will you just look!”

Goku paused in his attempts to free his arm from Lirin’s clutches and really looked at his uncle. Sanzo was busy fiddling with his camera but also looked like he was having an actual conversation with Kougaiji.

Sanzo didn’t _do_ conversations. He hated small talk, chit chat, people, and being nice. But right now, Sanzo’s usual bitch face was MIA and as Goku and Lirin watched, he even put down his camera to pay full attention to whatever Kougaiji was saying.

“Oh my god. Lirin, they’re dating.”

*****

“I can’t believe you didn’t get a picture of them!”

“Why didn’t _you_ get a picture of them?”

“Did you really have to text your boyfriend right this minute? We’re on a mission!” Lirin looked like she was ready to punch Goku, public venue or not. “How’re we supposed to convince everyone else that they’re dating if we don’t have proof?”

“Holy shit they’re coming this way—hide, _hide_.” Goku shoved Lirin behind a sunglasses kiosk and dove after her.

As far as dates went, this one was pretty tame. Sanzo and Kougaiji had just spent around an hour wandering around the mall and buying stuff for Kougaiji’s new apartment. There was no hand-holding or kissy faces. In fact, Goku and Lirin had seen zero physical contact. But Sanzo was definitely less wound up in a way that only happened around Goku, Gojyo, Hakkai, or Konzen. Plus, Lirin had practically had a heart attack when she saw the earrings Kougaiji was wearing (“Those are _mom’s earrings_ , Goku!”).

Kougaiji handed Sanzo a shopping bag so he had one hand free to pull his phone out and answer a call. Sanzo huffed in annoyance but accepted the bag.

“They’re like an old married couple,” Goku whispered in disbelief.

Lirin pulled out her own phone. “I need to text Yaone.”

*****

“You do realize that as long as he’s not doing weird shit where we can see it, I don’t care if Sanzo’s sleeping with anyone,” Konzen said.

“This is different!” Goku insisted.

Konzen’s raised eyebrow spoke volumes.

Goku flailed some more. It was the first time he’d ever seen his uncle _date_ anyone—actual ‘going out to eat and watch movies and talk’ dating—and it was weird. And it was Lirin’s _older brother_. If Sanzo ever did anything to upset Kougaiji, Lirin would take it out on Goku in some cruel, twisted way.

Konzen went back to whatever he was doing on his phone. “You are not allowed to bother your uncle about this.”

“But _dad_!”

*****

“Lirin, this is getting ridiculous.”

Lirin turned around so fast her ponytail whacked Goku in the face. Kougaiji fought not to laugh. Did they really think he wouldn’t notice them hiding behind a decorative potted plant?

“Big brother!” Lirin said. “We didn’t know you were here!”

Kougaiji raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. “Save it. You’re lucky Sanzo hasn’t arrived yet—he’s wanted to yell at you since the first time you followed us around.”

Lirin looked appropriately abashed but Goku was fidgety, eyes darting to the sides as he bounced on his feet. He looked like he was half expecting Sanzo to jump out from behind one of the restaurant tables and whack him.

Kougaiji let the two of them stew for a few more seconds before talking. “Yes, we’re dating. No, Lirin, you are not allowed to threaten Sanzo. Yaone and Doku know, but I don’t know if Sanzo’s told anyone on his side.”

The only reason Kougaiji didn’t lose his balance when Lirin attack-hugged him was because she did it every time she was excited about something. “Have you told mom?”

Kougaiji couldn’t stop himself from smiling even if he wanted to. “Not yet. I was hoping to ask for your help with that one.”

“I’m so excited!”

“Obviously,” Goku muttered, covering his ears.

“Okay, that’s enough,” Kougaiji said. “Time for the two of you to go bother someone else.” He herded them out of the restaurant before going back inside and claiming a table.

“Damn nosy brats,” Sanzo said, dropping down onto the seat across from him.

Kougaiji grinned. “Letting them go without feeling your wrath? You’re getting soft in your old age.”

Sanzo’s glare would have sent a weaker man running for the hills. Kougaiji ignored him in favor of going over the menu.

*****

You’re grounded.

What?? Why???

I told you not to bother Sanzo about his damn boyfriend!

But daaaad!!


End file.
